TODAY'S REASON TO DRINK

IN THIS ISSUE

Articles

8 Hours in a Barroom

5:45 pm You’ll just stop in the bar for a quick one after work. 6:10 pm Just one more beer to relieve the stress. I...

August: 365 Reasons to Get Drunk

Key: Holiday. Pithy comment. Suggested holiday libation. August 1 Modern Drunkard Magazine was unleashed on the drinking public (1996). Rise up, boozehead! Anything and everything. 2 Peter...

Palace of the Drunkard

Remember running through the streets, drunk on whiskey vomiting from the joint smoked at the taxi queue, stealing newspapers at dawn it was my birthday you were there but— I...
Barhopping Guide

The Drunkard’s Guide to Barhopping

The difference between a proper evening of bar hopping and a night of being rooted in a single bar is the same difference between...

Booze Vs. Baghdad

The current war is being touted as a war of good vs. evil, by us and Al-Qaeda. And it is. But to define it...

A Killer Drink

What you drink can say a lot about you—for better or worse. It seems that, with astonishing frequency, murderers tend to be connected with...
Adventures with Alcohol

Modern Drunkard Survival Guide

HOW TO SURVIVE AN A.A. MEETING 1.) Do not make eye contact. If you do, make sure your eyes do not flicker toward the flask...

Hobohemia

So you wanna be a wino. Well, it ain’t as easy as you might think. I mean, you can’t just wake up and find yourself...

The Faded Glory of the Martini Lunch

Winston Churchill, bolstered by gin martinis, outlasted the Luftwaffe. James Bond typically enjoyed a martini while on the clock, right before pummeling an extra into...
Quest for the Perfect Cocktail

The Quest for the Perfect Cocktail

The legendary libation was allegedly devised by an 18th-century alchemist/adventurer named Marquis Ferdinand D’Etatis, the very same ‘Mad Marquis’ who led the famous grog...

Lush For Life

If you’re a good boy and wait until you’re 21 to start boozing, and reach the life expectancy of an average American, you’re looking...

The Art of the Lost Weekend

Weekends were once the sovereign territory of the working stiff. Every tick and tock between the Friday exodus and Monday was consecrated ground, where a...

In Praise of Day Drinking

Mention being in a bar at 7:00 a.m. and the average person recoils in horror as his mind conjures up images of an ancient...

What Extinct Tastes Like

I've never really been “into” Scotch. Scotch tends to make people make snooty noises, makes them swirl their drink and discuss the “bouquet of flavors,”...

Columns and Regular Features

Modern Drunkard Video

Booze-Soaked Fiction

Adventures with Alcohol

All the Pretty Pictures

How To Articles

Drunkards of the Issue

Inebriate Interviews

Clash of the Tightest

The Great Drunks

Historical Hooching