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Jail House Hooch

Alcohol has been with us since the beginning of civilization, in the best and worst of circumstances. It has survived countless attempts to limit...

Drunkard of the Issue March 06: Brian Bachelor

This Kentucky gentleman reveals the healing properties of moonshine, how to chug on the cheap, and why it is sometimes necessary to ride a...

Better Living Through Alcohol

If you are reading MDM, you are probably already a brother of mine. Here I urge you to spread your faith. We have many...
The Great Eggnog Riot

The Great Eggnog Riot

Sylvanus Thayer—whose name sounds like a lizard-rat-man hybrid Lord Voldemort would keep caged for dark-magic rape rituals—took command of West Point in 1817. Within a...

Battle for the Booze: The New Attack on Alcohol

Eight uniformed policemen storm into the bar, shoving their way past the startled owner. A dozen of the bar's patrons, chosen at random, are...

Hello! My Name is Pancho

Hello! My name is Pancho. I have come to spit up on your carpet. Hello! My name is Pancho These are my friends. They like your beer, And...

Drunkard’s Dozen

The Eye Opener Rehumanize Yourself Good morning! How's your head? What's that? You'd like it surgically removed and replaced with a beach ball? No need to go...

Bout 5: Bukowski Vs Thomas & Bout 6: Burton Vs. Churchill

Who is the greatest boozer of all time? I can tell you who isn’t. Last month, we saw an overconfident Jackie Gleason nearly bungle his...

Take Me to Your Liquor!

Modern Drunkard: Thanks for coming to Denver for this chat. Tom Tierry: I was flying down here anyway. MD: You flew? TT: Yes. MD: In a...

The King Is Dead, Long Live the King

“Without heroes, we are all plain people and don’t know how far we can go.” — Bernard Malamud I heard the news in a bar....

Drunkard Rights Watch

Report Violations to: [email protected] MADD Demands Interlocks in All Vehicles WASHINGTON, DC—MADD wants alcohol detection devices in every vehicle in America. After first stating they only...

Nixing the Twist: The Four Rules

There are four rules to being an enforcer. Excerpt from 16mm MDM 1998 feature film Nixing the Twist. Players Jimmy: Luke Schmaltz Happy: David Gayman Victim: Mike V Director Frank Kelly Rich

The Founding Drunkards

Soon after they're born, American's minds are stuffed with interesting and inspirational stories about their nation's Founding Fathers. These men are a large part...

Everything I Ever Needed To Know About Life I Learned from the Rat Pack

“It took me a long, long time to learn what I now know, and I don’t want that to die with me.” —Frank...

Columns and Regular Features

Modern Drunkard Video

Booze-Soaked Fiction

Adventures with Alcohol

All the Pretty Pictures

How To Articles

Drunkards of the Issue

Inebriate Interviews

Clash of the Tightest

The Great Drunks

Historical Hooching