Modern Drunkard Magazine

Staggering, I mean really staggering, is rapidly becoming a lost art. In fact, in this modern PC world, the only one who appreciates a good...

1. If you don't drink that booze, by God, someone else will. 2. The brewing industry alone employs 1.7 million people and that's a lot...

“The whole world is three drinks behind," Humphrey Bogart proclaimed in 1950. “If everyone in the world would take three drinks, we would have...

Do you have a favorite drunkard? Some amazing man or woman, past or present, who stands colossus-like atop the Big Keg, the ground below littered...

Make no mistake— Captain Kirk and his crew were cowboys and they treated the universe like the Wild West. There was always a lot of...

Is absinthe as dangerous as they say, and where can I get some? Dangerous is a relative word. Yes, absinthe is made with wormwood, which...

 Religious Nutjobus Characteristics: While their plumage is usually well-preened, this Dry moves in a strangely stiff and awkward manner. Don't let his aggressively friendly smile...

I staggered through the gauntlet of scantily-clad tribeswomen and their brutal staffs rained down like the Devil's own hailstorm. I gritted my teeth against...

When you  get right down to it, we drunkards are a pretty easy-going bunch. Our needs are not excessive. Give us a glass of whiskey...

This Public Service Announcement, and accompanying literary dramatization, is brought to you by Active Alcoholics, or AA. We are aware that you may have...

As much as we might sling around the phrase “Judeo-Christian,” most of us are pagans at heart. Scratch modernity, find paganism lurking underneath. Take toasts,...

The Fifth Legion is on the march. They move at a fast trot beneath a beggar's moon, gladius swords in hand, their armor rattling in...

From Tatarstan to Kyrgyzstan to Tuva, in what used to be the great thirsty interior of the Soviet Union, Central Asian nomads have the...

When we think about Antarctica we tend to think about vast tracts of frozen wastes, of desperate men whipping dogs toward lonely deaths or...

I don’t know how many countries actually signed the Evil Booze Nonproliferation Treaty of 1903, but we can safely say it was a total...

During my sophomore year of college I enrolled in a course entitled Modern Sub-Saharan Africa. Despite the impressive title, the course consisted of one...

Your hosts: Frank Kelly Rich (Founder and Editor of MDM) and Nick Plumber (Poetry Editor and Travel Writer for MDM). Special guest: Noted libertarian misanthrope...

Try to picture Sam Spade or Philip Marlowe without free and frequent access to the hard stuff, and your mind’s eye is likely to...