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East Side Sketches

East Side Sketches

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The dogs are barking at the sky And old John Antonia stumbles out of the bar. He’s had too much wine But he’s old and today he’s...
The Beauty in the Blackout

The Beauty in the Blackout

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I'm lying in bed with my consort of the moment, staring at the ceiling with a loud white void glaring garishly in my memory. There...

The Secret Language of Cocktails

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Your cocktail says something about you. For instance, ordering a martini says you appreciate the finer things in life, ordering a gin and tonic says...

Dying Under the Radar

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You did it again. You went out on a work night. The stop at your favorite neighborhood bar for ‘just a quick beer” turned into...

Bout 5: Bukowski Vs Thomas & Bout 6: Burton Vs. Churchill

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Who is the greatest boozer of all time? I can tell you who isn’t. Last month, we saw an overconfident Jackie Gleason nearly bungle his...

Trotsky and Tequila

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“A glass of milk,” the short Yanqui demanded. Juan the bartender rattled his copy of El Toro but did not look up. “Leche! Leche, damn you!” “This...
Solution to All of Life's Problems

Solutions to All of Life’s Problems

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  The Problem  The Drink  The Solution You lost your job. Brutal Hammer 1 part cheapest vodka 1 part cheapest burgundy Cynically throw in a few ice cubes. Drink ten of these and pass...

Muskets and Moonshine: The Whiskey Rebellion of 1794

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When you  get right down to it, we drunkards are a pretty easy-going bunch. Our needs are not excessive. Give us a glass of whiskey...

Drunkard of the Issue #61: Dear Booze

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If you fancy yourself a hard drinker and aren’t following notoriously unrepetent drunkard Colin Deal (@Dear_Booze) on Twitter, then you are needlessly depriving yourself...
Keith Moon

Top Drunks: Keith Moon

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Wild-eyed and soaked, a naked young man breaks the surface of the swimming pool full of party debris—bottles, pool side chairs and an…er, Cadillac—gasps...

Cads, Rakes and Bounders

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Does a drink cadged from a stranger taste far superior to one earned by the sweat of your brow? Are you immune to the slightest...

I Am Rotgut Man

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Give me the worst bourbon you got. No, I don’t want to hear the speech the Maker’s Mark rep taught you, I want what...

Local Only

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It’s a little after ten in the morning on a Saturday, I’ve just retrieved a bucket of ice, and the phone rings. I set the...

Fables of Almost Famous Drunkards

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The Fatal Phone Call Henry Peepindrink of Ashtabula, Ohio, invented the telephone in 1847, two years before Alexander Graham Bell was born. Peepindrink was a...

Paradise Lost: The Tiki Experience

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Every man, whether he knows it or not, feels some primordial attraction for the allure of paradise. After all, down the centuries the world’s major...

Boozing in the Big Leagues

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Forget mom. Forget apple pie. The game of baseball is the single most recognizable symbol of our national heritage and character. For well over a...

Columns and Regular Features

Modern Drunkard Video

Booze-Soaked Fiction

Adventures with Alcohol

All the Pretty Pictures

How To Articles

Drunkards of the Issue

Inebriate Interviews

Clash of the Tightest

The Great Drunks

Historical Hooching