“It takes two tugboats to get this ship headed out to sea.”
Ronnie K. at 3 Kings, explaining why he always orders two cocktails as his first round.

“Once we learn how to get past this bartender, get past all the bartenders, then we will know peace and justice and beer.”
Self-professed “professional anarchist” whispering a plot against the Powers That Be at The Bulldog Pub.

“I’ve no idea why I’m so drunk. I’ve no horse in this fight. I must like horse fights.”
A libertarian gets caught up in the churning waters of partisan politics at Three Kings Tavern.

“It’s okay to slur your words if you can still stand up. If I’m not a man of my word, I’m not a man of anything.”
Slurring gent using his back to hold up an exterior wall of the Mutiny Bookstore.

“A man who buys two cases of beer instead of one is either concerned about his future or a generous guy. Either way, ladies, he’s a catch.”
@Dear_Booze on Twitter.

“I wanted to tell you something. You have very beautiful hands. I wish you were working.”
An elderly gentleman attempting to chat up the day bartender while the night bartender escorts him out of the Satire Lounge.