The robots are coming! The robots are coming! That’s right. It’s Global Stop the Bots Day. And it’s timely, considering the late Stephen Hawkings’ recently published warning that A.I. will eventually destroy us if we don’t keep it in check. You know, we at Modern Drunkard Magazine have always embraced technology. We had a website up in the 1990s, long before many mega-magazines and newspapers decided to engage in what they thought was a passing fad. But, if you’ve been watching the tech news lately, the advancements being made with A.I. and robotics are a bit disconcerting. And there’s even talk about giving these machines rights, for chrissakes. And you may have noticed that some of the first public-facing robots, as opposed to those that toil in factories, were robot bartenders. Their inventors were like, “Hey, all bartenders do is mix things together. We have a bot for that!” You also may have noticed that they haven’t caught on so far, because people want more than drinks from a bartender. They want conversation. They want compassion. They want the human touch. Alcohol is an emotive and who wants to expand their emotions with a machine? It’s like writing love letters to your toaster. Stop the bots!