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June 25: Custer’s Last Stand


On this day in 1876, the Battle of the Little Bighorn, a.k.a. Custer’s Last Stand, went down. So you’re probably wondering, did General George Armstrong Custer like a drink? He did not. He was a rabid teetotaler. And a hero and martyr to the forces of temperance, right up until his arrogant personality and poor leadership skills began to be exposed, at which point the prohibitionists abandoned him, declaring that the lifelong abstainer was in fact a “dry drunk” because, you know, George’s father liked to drink. That’s the kind of contorted logic that goes down on the other side of the fence. Fortunately, it’s also George Orwell’s birthday, who did like a drink. Often, a lot of drinks. Top quote: “No doubt alcohol, tobacco, and so forth, are things that a saint must avoid; but sainthood is also a thing that human beings must avoid.”